A little embarrassed, a little humbled

I'm not a drug addict or any other morally degrading member of society, but I've pretty much been a total sloth the past month or so. To clarify, sloth:

What it is: Sloth is the avoidance of physical or spiritual work

Why you do it: You’re shiftless, lazy and good fer nuthin’

Your punishment in Hell will be: You’ll be thrown into snake pits

Here's the synopsis over the past few months: going to bed no earlier than midnight, waking up around 730am, getting to work no sooner than 9:15 (with an 8:30 start time), putting off important work projects for more menial tasks like sending out DHL's and submitting entries for publications awards contests, heading out of town every few weeks to play, doing no school work until the weekend (usually Sunday night) , and spending most of my evenings at home parked on the couch with a couple glasses of wine while stalking people on MySpace or reading perezhilton.com.

Sounds lovely, doesn't it? But in reality it has negatively influenced my school and professional work, and as someone who is hoping to get a lotta cash for my fall semester AND finagle my way into an overseas consultant position with my company, this is NOT the way to go.

It all came to a head last night. I'm only 1 of 3 graduate students in my class. Our prof. returned a homework assignment, one that I had spent a significant amount of time on (or so I thought), but somehow still jacked it up and got the equivalent of a C. I was LIVID. How could I have f-ed up so royally, when I thought I had tried so hard? How could I have confused a simple task in Excel, a program I used EVERY DAY FOR FOUR YEARS at work? How could 20-year-olds HAVE DONE BETTER THAN ME?!

Needless to say, I wanted to end it. Not really, but I was on the verge of tears/punching the wall. I couldn't believe I had made such a simple mistake. The tears ended up surfacing on the cab ride home. I'm not really sure why self-disappointment brings me to tears (especially at a time when 33 people were just brutally murdered). But it did. And I was there, in a cab, crying.

So what did I do? I called my daddy! Yup, this independent, working woman/graduate student who has traveled alone in West Africa, lived alone for 3 years, doesn't like to go home...can't keep it together when she receives a shitty grade on a homework assignment and has to call her daddy.

After talking me down from the ledge, and building me up like any good father would do...("you've achieved everything you've ever wanted to do, even to the point of turning things down....you are working so hard, much harder than many other students, b/c of your work, travel....you will recover next week and get a perfect grade...you are remarkable, bla bla..."), I felt much better.

So, in the end I realized that I REAAALLLLLY need to get my shit back on track. I know that this was just a slump and that we all go through it. I know that I am not this person most of the time, and I just need motivate and keep going...hopefully without the silly tears and whining to daddy, and end up in the place where I hope to be in the next few years...which is certainly not in a snake pit.

I fought back today...Grrrr

After seeing the below segment on Extra TV tonight, I had to put my two cents in and post a comment (ah, rant) on their website. I realize that I may be more sensitive to these things then the average Joe, but whatevs...it must be said:

April 5, 2007
'American Idol': Bringing Hope to Africa

They are the faces you won’t forget and the stories that Simon Cowell wants you to remember.

Only “Extra’s” Terri Seymour traveled to Africa with Simon and Ryan Seacrest to one of the most impoverished villages in the world to witness the pain and the promise of some brave children.

“It’s just unbelievable, it’s just wrong,” Simon professed, admitting that he didn’t expect conditions to be as bad as they were.

Terri’s video diary captured every emotional moment of “Idol Gives Back,” the show’s crusade against worldwide poverty.

“It’s hard to believe these smiling children live in such horrific conditions,” Simon said astonishingly. “This is quite literally hell on Earth; I have never seen anything like it in my life.”

It was in the children’s village where we witnessed Simon’s most emotional moment.
“We just went into a house with one mother who is HIV positive,” Simon told us. “She has 13 children in there and she gets up at 6 in the morning and if there's no work, there's no food… and they are the nicest, sweetest kids you've ever seen in your life.”

“Idol Gives Back” will turn viewer votes into donations from sponsors, with the money helping poor children in Africa as well as here in the U.S.

Organizer Richard Curtis told “Extra” that witnessing the desperate conditions was a real wake up call.

“I think that's what particularly got to Simon, that he just couldn't believe the reality of the situation,” Curtis said.

Fortunately, this is a situation that viewers will be able to change, when “Idol Gives Back” starts on FOX April 24.

For more information on "Idol Gives Back," log on to http://www.americanidol.com/idolgivesback/.

Posted by ExtraTV Staff on April 5, 2007 1:47 PM Permalink

http://extratv.warnerbros.com/2007/04/american_idol_bringing_hope_to.html

My Subsequent Post

Comments (1)

Seeing this piece was nice indeed, but it might be good to mention WHERE in "AFRICA" they traveled to.

It's always so frustrating to see stories about events/people/issues in Africa that aren't recognized for where they are. They way you portray it, all of the continent of Africa is the same, with the same issues and concerns.

Take out a map and read the newspaper and you'll see that there are very individual countries within Africa, with individual issues and people, who I'm sure would like to be recognized for their differences.

The only distinctive thing I got from your piece was they were traveling in an English speaking country. But there's a big difference between a county like Ghana and a country like Uganda.

I realize that this is a Hollywood entertainment show, but more people watch this stuff than read the newspaper, and if this is where they get the bulk of their knowledge about the world, then I am definitely concerned.

Thanks.
Me, Boston

PS...and I kid you not, the name of the pic file was "Simon with African Children."

The Makings of Greatness...

Are apparently not going to be explored here.

I'm truly disappointed ladies.

BB on a Thursday Night

BB had a long few days at work....
BB enjoyed her Thursday night at home, made dinner, watched her shows...
BB talked to Blondee about life, fun times...
BB had 2 glasses of red wine (ok, 3-4)
BB talked to A. about fun weekend ahead in Beantown...
BB finished said shows...
BB wanted to grab a shower before final fave show, and decided to run for a quick shower in between....
(BB loves her TV night)....
BB scurries from bathroom towards bedroom to dispose soiled clothes in hamper...
En route BB starts taking off clothes, and as pants have cleared bottom (and venturing towards knees), BB falls on ass with loud thump.
BB is on ground with pants around knees showing off new aqua thong for all to see...
Once BB knows she is not hurt, BB breaks out in laughter....

unfortunately there's no one to see BB laughing with her pants around her knees in her fun thong.

BB wishes someone were here to laugh at her :)

My Boss Said I have Bedroom Eyes

I'm not sure how to feel about this comment. My boss was comparing me to a good friend of hers with similar mannerisms, physical characteristics and the like....including my apparently BEDROOM eyes.

I was surprised she said this, but equally intrigued about what it really meant. I knew what it implied....but needed to consult the master myself, Urban Dictionary:


bedroom eyes

1-That sensual seductive-looking glance that you express when you are in a mood for something romantic and/or sexual.

Rebuttal: I'm glad to know my boss (a woman) thinks I'm in heat at the office.

Example:

a) "The stripper greeted me with bedroom eyes when I was handing her my money."

Or handing in the annual report I was editing.

b) "When I saw my girl for the first time in a skimpy nightgown, we gave each other bedroom eyes and proceeded to make some lovin'."

Or proceeded to collaborate on the new company brochure.

bedroom eyes

2-sexy, suggestive eyes that make one want to totally be in a bedroom with the bearer.

Hmmmmmmm............

You need to try this!

Whatever, Red, I'm loud and I'm proud. I don't see any tumbleweeds around here. Okay, I haven't blogged since...thinking...whatever. Shut up.

You need to try this!

Two months ago, I signed up for this organic food delivery service and I think the rest of the world needs to get on board. It's fantastic! For $27-$33 every two weeks (or however often you want deliveries) you will receive a huge box of mixed or organic fruits and vegetables. I've gotten everything from golden pineapple to portabello mushrooms to granny smith apples. There are a couple of options in the District but I have to recommend Washington Green Grocer(www.washingtonsgreengrocer.com).

Just for the record, I'm not some earthy, crunchy girl that only eats things that have dirt of them, aren't cooked and that I've harvested myself. I like my vegetables washed, well-cooked, and off the stem when I get them. Which, these are. But, like too many people my age, I work WAY too much and have little time to run to the store. WGG delivers to my work address every Thursday (delivery days change if you live in Virginia or Maryland) since I don't have a doorman. It's seriously one of the best things I've done and totaly recommend it! Let us know how you like it, or don't like it.

is that the sound of....

tumbleweeds?

7:15 pm, DECEMBER 1...Temperature outside: 68 degrees

Yes, that's right. Today, the first day of December...And the temperature in the district is a ridiculous 68 degrees. I mean...What is the story here?? How does one dress for this kind of mid-winter heat wave? Are we sure cotton is out of the question? Is a seersucker blazer appropriate? Do I have to wear stockings with my skirts or is bare-leg occasionally appropriate when the culprit is global warming? Fashion police forgive us- we are a confused city parading around in miniskirts and tweeds uncertain of what tomorrow will bring us. According to weather.com- 37 degrees and sunny.

Seriously though- this weather is freaking me out. Its weird to get on the metro on the first day of the Christmas month to foggy doors and beads of perspiration. I spent all summer dodging sweaty strangers on the metro- its just not a winter sport, my friends. But again, as I sit here at my desk, with the window open to let the fresh air into my apartment, I look at my thermostat and see the heat (usually blasting at a comfortable 70 degrees) is instead in the "OFF" setting.

Now don't get me wrong- it was quite refreshing to step outside of my office today and take in the beautiful clear sky, the warm breeze, the giddy grins of the downtown set. But that moment is fleeting as I look in shop windows to see packages dressed in big gold bows and sleighs and reindeer left and right. Christmas is around the corner and I haven't even gotten to wear mittens and a scarf yet! I haven't seen my breath on cold morning air, or the frost dew on the grass and windshields... I haven't bundled up to hike to the metro in a warm fuzzy coat, or snuggled up in a blanket to keep warm at night...I haven't seen the little red noses of the children heading to the elementary school next door, or the smell of a fire burning. (ok, I know, I'm not really going to smell a fire burning anytime soon in my neighborhood...but you know what I mean)

My hot chocolate in the morning just doesn't taste as good when its not cold outside- I'm ready for the cold front, whenever its ready. I'm sure I'll eat my words in a matter of days- but really, enough of the balmy winter weather!!

I'm not even sure who I'm appealing to at this point because I'm pretty certain God has WAY more pressing issues at hand (it is World AIDS day today!) but throw me a bone here...Besides, who doesn't look great with flushed cheeks and rosy lips?!